I need a personal retreat, and chances are if you are reading this you probably do too. Coming off a very involved and interactive month of June and early July - birthdays, weddings and meeting so many new people - I have found it challenging to step it all the way down into my cave of Adullam with my Father, where true transformation takes place.
I received this leading fresh in my spirit, just in time for me and perhaps for you too.
What counts as a Retreat?
Let’s lay some groundwork with an open mind. Some of us have embarked on many retreats in the past, but I remember relearning the proper way to retreat long into my journey of making them. God will sometimes allow us to journey with zeal for a time, and then He will introduce skill. A personal (spiritual) retreat is the conscious and intentional practice of separation unto God. This is a specific time we set apart in which we exist completely in the way Adam was always meant to in the beginning of time, before the fall of man:
We tend the garden of our souls (Genesis 2:15) - The Bible teaches us that the heart of man, the functional connective organ between the soul and the spirit, is like a garden full of soil. And that it will either be fertile and soft, or rocky producing only death.
We feed on the tree of Life, that is, the Word of God (Genesis 2:9) - Unlike our forerunners, we believers have come to know the most appealing food to our souls should be that which produces Life, which is the Word of God. In retreat, we quell the cravings of our flesh and lean into the hunger of our spirits for a Word that is enough to save (Matthew 8:8).
We spend quality time with the Lord, in fellowship with the Holy Spirit (Genesis 3:8) - We cease running from God’s expectation of (and provision for) daily intimate fellowship with Him, coming naked and exposed with our flaws and inconsistencies to the One who sees us and sees through us.
How do I know I need a Retreat?
Our world today is packed with dopamine: Addictive activities, food, habits and even people. The result is an overstimulated generation that is ridden with cravings including lust, drugs, food and validation. We have never needed to retreat more than in this day and age. Hey, a new social platform just came out. And while we as believers must take advantage of these platforms for the work of the Kingdom, we must first establish control over its potential influence on our souls.
It’s possible to get hooked on good dope: As active believers, we have our favorite preachers, teachers and scriptural surgeons feeding us with good content throughout social platforms and forms of engagement. But it is possible to be addicted to the circle of information to the point that it affects our connection to the Source.
“All things are lawful for me,” but I will not be dominated by anything. - 1 Corinthians 6:12
Yes, even those things that are good for us can be consuming - ministry can consume personal transformation and communal fellowship can dry up the deep waters of private intimacy into the shallow waters of eye-service.
But our God is a mystery that hides Himself in secret, longing to be sought out by the sons of men.
“Truly, you are a God who hides himself, O God of Israel, the Savior.” - Isaiah 45:15
One of the synonyms I found for the word “secret” is close-mouthed, and this lent some depth to the critical case for personal retreats. Another word for secret is “hidden”. Hidden things must be searched out, and if we would apply the wisdom of a treasure hunter to seeking the Face of God, we must do so with great discretion and focus, eliminating distractions and external voices that influence one’s cause.
Ultimately my generation struggles with silence, but the believer must embrace it. In the story of Elijah, God was not in the tumult or the raging, He was found in the quiet whisper of the wind.
These are the primary ways I recognize that I need a personal retreat:
Make retreats a regular practice: In this noisy world, there is no need for an assessment towards the recommendation of a retreat. It is a necessary practice with which we must punctuate our spiritual journeys, waiting on the Lord for the promise of new strength and fresh direction. The result is always a deep recalibration of purpose that directs, energizes and propels.
Listen to the beckoning of the Spirit to come up higher: As a people filled with a different Spirit than that which is in the world, we do not rely simply on feelings or opinions to live our lives. We are led by the Spirit of God. And if this leading is effectively in place, we will consistently be reminded of the way to go, and when and how to walk in it (Isaiah 30:21).
The spirit realm is about heights and depths: Heights refer to revelation, and depths to intimacy. There are revelations that cannot be seen at certain heights, and experiences that require certain depths of relationship. John on the island of Patmos was emptied of himself (willingly and unwillingly since he was left without sustenance, to suffer) and found depths of intimacy in this emptiness of his flesh. The result? A call to come up higher with the promise to be “shown the things which must be.” (Revelation 4:1) Listen to that still small voice, the burden in your bosom, calling you to seek out more.
Stay sensitive to spiritual and natural changes: There is an incessant tug of war between the flesh and the spirit that we will experience throughout our earthly journey. The flesh can gain ground on a spirit-filled believer in the form of vices, cravings and a fire that has gone dim. We can also discern weaknesses in our spiritual position, by the bombardment of our dream lives with strange and ungodly images and activities that threaten our strength and identity.
Whenever I sense my flesh gaining ground on my spirit, it can be uncomfortable and even disheartening. When you’re committed to anything it’s normal to want it to remain on track all the time. But I’ve learned that God uses these moments of weaknesses or temptations to spur growth in us - but that outcome requires a conscious choice to overcome. In an intentional walk with God, we will be tempted by failure, carnality, cycles of the mundane and weakness - lots of it. It is only in the quietness of time alone with the Father that He reveals to us that even those we admire for great and mighty power with God also went through the wilderness we often find ourselves in, and that like them, we will emerge stronger.
I’m reminded of Elijah who looked up to heaven and asked to die. “For I am no better than my fathers” (1 Kings 19:4). A life in the Spirit can feel that way sometimes. And yet, this man Elijah had just called down fire from heaven moments before his expression of despair. How often do we go right from periods of calling down fire, into moments of despair? I love the Word of God for shedding true light on the human condition, in a way that encourages us. Noting his state of mind, the Spirit of God carried Elijah further into solitude, and fed him with the food of angels until he regained strength and continued his assignment. Don’t be ashamed of weakness, only know that you are not alone and there is food for your soul in God. And at the end of that wilderness is an assignment that the adversary of your soul cannot keep you from fulfilling by the grace found only in our God.
How to Make an Effective Spiritual Retreat
Through this article I toggled between using the words “personal retreat” and “spiritual retreat” because just like there are medical fasts and spiritual fasts, there are secular and spiritual retreats.
A time ago, I found this pretty awesome video about what members of the “online self improvement” camp call the Dopamine Fast. You can think of this as a secular (non spiritual or religious) retreat. The fast in this context is an exclusion from everything that stimulates dopamine in a person: music and videos, phones and TV are exchanged for books, salty or sugary and delicious foods are exchanged for vegetables and some fruit, and human interaction is exchanged for pure unadulterated silence. The result, they have found, is renewed mental strength, diminished cravings and an inward reflection that replaced the lust for external validation. I actually tried my hand at this process and it works - just like the sacrifice of the occult in fasting can yield results that impact the weakened believer (read 2 Kings 3:27, if you need a reference). So if unbelievers are aware of the power of silence and self-denial, how much more we who dwell in the Light of the Son of God?
Jesus himself lived the perfect example of the importance of regular personal retreats, stealing away from the crowd of ministry, and noisy interactions for periods of time alone with the Father, as much as he was able. This did not adversely impact his relationships, mission or ministry, but in fact strengthened and informed him, giving him more visibility as many sought him desperately while he retreated. Something took place in secret that culminated in power with God and vivid insight into what was to come regarding his suffering, death and the glory that awaited him.
When we retreat, as a believers in the Way, we not only disconnect from the things of the natural, but we reconnect to great depths of the Divine. We do not simply empty ourselves, but we fill the void with the Word of God, the fellowship of the Spirit (in praise, worship and prayer) and the breaking of the bread in Holy Communion. This is how we give no room to the flesh (Romans 13;14). We do not simply sweep our houses clean and empty, ready to be overrun by the barrage of wickedness that roams the earth - anger, cravings, lustful thoughts and desires - but we fill ourselves until there is an overflow all around us.
I recall when I made the decision to add my morning prayer time to my work calendar. It was a bold and risky decision given the secular organization I work for, and the “openness of mind” that it promotes, with regards to the things believers know to be the perversions of the flesh. I did it anyway, and made it visible to all, because I felt a deep leading to do so. Months later a direct report of mine approached me and mentioned that seeing that block of time on my calendar made him consider setting time apart to pray or meditate. This is someone who is not a born-again believer, but he said he watched how I showed up every day and considered that this morning time I set apart to prepare my spirit for the day might be the secret. The world is watching us, believers. And being filled such that it overflows into the lives of others appears not to be a hope, but a necessity in this age.
Here are the most critical steps I take to make a successful retreat:
Step 1 - Set a Goal
Before we can make a successful retreat, we must first define what success looks like. This is a critical step and is not one-size-fits-all. Every time we are called to retreat, whether as a regular practice (highly recommended) or as a response to some of the stimulus I mentioned earlier on, we must define what we hope to gain. Some example spiritual retreat success criteria include:
◦ To hear from the Father on a matter, or on the matters on His heart (top priority)
◦ To exchange fear for love, and exterminate unbelief
◦ To recalibrate our minds, breaking from ungodly thought patterns and cycles
◦ To reestablish the realities of our true identity in Christ within us
◦ To gain strength from comfort in the arms of the One who loves us so much
◦ To establish a spiritual game-plan for a period of time such as a new month, a new year, a new job, a new season etc.
◦ To break cycles of prayerlessness, distraction, spiritual weightlessness and carnality
I could go on and on, but one thing I have learned is that with God, you may come for one thing but you always leave with more. Set a goal, but come with an open heart.
Step 2 - Prepare the Retreat Location
I have made personal retreats in the comfort of my home, and outside of it. I believe there is value in both, especially to avoid the excuse that you’re unable to make way to a dedicated place of retreat. Ideally, a retreat would be performed outside of your regular environment and preferably in a space that has a physical or spiritual height, to aid spiritual ascension. Think about it this way, there is a reason our beloved Lord Jesus left his space for mountaintops to retreat. The mountaintops are not just physically high points, they also have much meaning. Mountaintops represent the physical place on earth that God Himself touched to, when He revealed Himself to the Israelites by fire and lightening and much terror, and conducted some of the most physically evident business with mankind ever, at the Exodus from Egypt. This gives the mountains spiritual significance.
The key here is that a believer need not suffer to find a high point, but should find a place where man has done business with God, to retreat. I personally love to retreat at dedicated retreat centers usually run by clergy, men and women who have dedicated their lives to serving God. When I enter such campsites, convents or retreat centers with an emptiness in my flesh, I find that Light pours in so much quicker than I can capture, and certainly more than when I retreat in my home. These retreat centers and religious campsites also expertly and strictly promote the practice of silence, making them the perfect grounds for meeting with God.
Step 3 - Create the Atmosphere for a Flow
The Holy Spirit is a very sensitive personality. As a King-Spirit, He wants exactly what He wants, and He comes when the stage is set. Being the Temple of this Great Spirit, we are more than privileged to house the greatness of His potential. However, we know that we do not always reflect the realities of this potential which is why we often need to intentionally seek Him - because in seeking we find, in knocking is the door opened and in asking do we receive. Think of Queen Esther approaching King Ahaseurus, her husband, to ask a great favor. Although he was her husband, she approached him as a great and mighty king, with the respect and honor due him, in order to succeed in her endeavor. To connect to what is available inside of us and around us we must create a suitable atmosphere within and without, for the Spirit of God to flow.
The atmosphere within requires curbing the cravings of the flesh - food, sex (if married) and sound (no music, no sermons, no self help videos, certainly no tv) - to pretty much show your flesh that it is your spirit that runs this show. And since your spirit is governed by the Spirit of God, as a believer, you will literally begin to sense the Holy Spirit taking the head-seat in your mind, heart and body.
The atmosphere without is what is known in heaven as the Incense of the Saints. This incense is the worship of our God and the prayers of the believer (Revelation 5:8). Worship does not necessarily mean songs, although one can sing if led, but we must think of worship as intentional adoration of the focus on one’s deepest love. King David’s Psalms are full of this adoration, and you need not sing them to pray them and experience their efficacy.
Fill the atmosphere of your retreat with much incense, because our God loves its smell. In the Old Testament, when God gave Moses the blueprint for the tabernacle of meeting, the incense stand was erected right before the veil that led to the Holy of Holies. Why? Because our Holy God cannot smell human flesh, or we will be consumed. The special formula for incense God gave Moses would mask the putrid smell of disobedience and stubbornness we inherited, and grant us entrance into the presence of the King. It is true that Christ has torn the veil, giving us license for entrance into God’s presence, yet must enter the spiritual Holy of Holies with the right principles of worship and prayer - worship that recognizes the beauty and holiness of our God, and prayers of repentance and submission. Think of it as receiving the license to drive legally, versus possessing a working car that one can actually drive. Jesus taught us this pattern of entering Gods presence, when he taught us to pray (Luke 11:2-5).
Step 4 - Expect anything & Journal everything
Setting a retreat plan or intention only helps to calibrate our minds in expectation, but it is important to flow with the Spirit in the direction He deems to take. That is the entire point of a retreat; to exercise our spiritual muscle of surrender and be guided by the Spirit in the way that we should go.
Don’t be rigid, expecting only that which you came for and missing everything that God is pouring out. Journal every thought, every dream, every vision and revelation. Journal your feelings and watch them go from weakness to strength, from confusion to clarity and from shallow to deep. As a natural writer I have found great treasure in writing down every experience especially on my spiritual journey, long before this blog would exist. But journals are not for writers alone, they are for pattern seekers, treasure hunters and record keepers in the spirit - that which we all must be, to keep up with the move of God in and around our lives.
Happy retreating! I hope that it is everything you need in-season. Do write to me your experiences, I would love to hear them.
Grace-Grace.
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